I’m Kinda Done

Every now and then I get to these points where I’m just kinda done. Done with stress, done with attitudes, done with myself, and my insecurities, just done. I’m tired of trying to think of what other people think of me or how they see me, but at the same time I just care too much. I am truly tired. Everything within me wants to just stop caring but there’s still this little part that takes me over COMPLETELY. I can’t control it... yet. It drains me to think so much of the past me, present me, and future me all of which have been winging it. I fly by the seat of pants trying to please people. I guess that’s why I’ve never really been able to be me and I probably will never be. Just when I feel like giving up something happens where I decide I have to wing it another day. I’m realizing now I’ve been doing it for 19 years. Gosh, 19 years of trying to appease unappeasable people. That’s tiring. I’m just so done with all the crap. When will I, and the rest of the world for that matter, just grow up and stop playing the same games over and over and over again and be mature. I guess never. 

Sincerely,

The tired one